It’s been no secret that this blog aspires to the highest, most elitist echelons of film criticism, and to understand the world we share through the rich medium of cinema, and my lust to be taken seriously has led me to watch this live action version of the popular Inspector Gadget cartoon. Derided from the moment of release, it’s now being touted for a reboot; I’m casting a critical eye over the original in a failed attempt to understand exactly what went wrong with this movie.
Memories of the original cartoon are as faded as The Hair Bear Bunch and Baggy Pants and the Nitwits; all that remains is a jolly theme song and a vague recollection of trench-coats, telescopic legs and BOINNGGG sound-effects. A feature demands rather more, and so Inspector Gadget begins in a fashion that would delight any child; a violent car accident that provides an origin story by divesting a security guard and his escaping quarry of their appendages. For The Claw (Rupert Everett), it’s the loss of one hand caused by a bowling ball falling through his sunroof. For Riverton, Ohio law enforcer John Brown (Matthew Broderick), it’s a complete physical upgrade of genuinely cartoonish proportions; telescopic arms and legs are only part of his transformation. Now Inspector Gadget, he’s ‘like the Six Million Dollar Man’ one character observes in a child-friendly reference to a mid-70’s show that ended two decades previously.
If the cartoon had a point, it was to combine the ineptitude of Inspector Clouseau with the gadget-heavy espionage games of James Bond. David Kellogg’s version was an expensive venture of the time, but offers little in the way of art or clarity. Gadget has an evil doppelganger, also played by Broderick, a ditzy girlfriend (Joely Fisher) and a talking car voiced by Dl Hughley. Edited down from 110 minutes to less that 70 minutes of actual action, the result is hopelessly garbled, impossible to follow and ugly on the eye.
Yet a scrap of entertainment survives; there’s an amusing post-credits scene which sees Richard Kiel and a number of other minion/villain helpers attending a support group, the one brief moment that actually sparks a laugh. Otherwise, pro support like Rene Auberjonois and Dabney Coleman have super-brief cameos, but no chance to shine, while weird speech-bubble flashbacks seem to allude to a different version of the film on the cutting room floor. Inspector Gadget is hoist by his own petard as a mechanical failure, which is what both the character and the film are, a soulless scream that damaged the careers of all concerned, and didn’t do much for me either.
So no Penny or Brain?
They are there, but not really central to the story. This ain’t yo mamma’s Inspector Gadget.
That’s too bad. I remember them being the “real” stars of the cartoon.
They’re probably happy to be sidelined here.
Is Brain cgi? or a trained dog?
Trained dog.
At least that is one good choice they made in this movie.
Bear in mind there’s an actor who has become a byword for gangly portrayals and perhaps could extend that element of his performance to gangly arms.
Cumberbatch for Gadget? I bet we’re not the first to have that thought, could just see him in a trenchcoat and hat…
Love that idea!
A game changing move that could make him a proper actor!
Is he not proper now?
Not as proper as. If he played Inspector Gadget. FacT!
You’d best let him know ASAP!
I’ve seen him down Londis, I’ll have a word…
It’s either him or Jim Carrey. Bruce Willis or Jason Statham as a long shot.
Though I do remember loving the cartoon as a kid (or at least the theme song), Cumberbatch as I.G. is the one and only way you’d get me to watch a film versions of this story….
Also, well done on correctly using “hoist by his own petard.” That’s a phrase I’ve always wanted to put in my own writing but just never found the right moment……
I guess I’m not the first to use it, but beware, it does not mean what most people think it means…
To hoist or not to hoist…that is the question….
I suppose I thought a petard was a rope one might be hoisted on, but turns out it is to be blown into the air by your own explosion…
I actually always imagined it as being stabbed and lifted on your own spear …. apparently this is just my overactive imagination but we both got the gist 🙂
Yes, I can see how that would work. I guess I didn’t think of explosions in the time of Shakespeare or Hamlet, but that would be an error in my part, a schoolboy misconception that would leave me impaled on my own spear, hung on my own rope, blown up by my own explosion and indeed, hoist by my own petard.
Haha. I will let that stand as the last and best word on the subject!
Touché!
You managed to fit the phrase in now so well done. Not sure every old television cartoon can be turned into a movie.
My Mum’s nickname was Inspector Gadget but that doesn’t help. Loved the cartoon but won’t be seeing this or any remake, too silly.
Did she have telescopic arms and legs, or a propeller in her hat?
No to the first wouldn’t have put it past her for the second.
Is the correct answer.
Could never figure out why an actor as talented and likeable as Broderick had so much trouble on screen. Even in good movies he seems like he’s the part that doesn’t fit.
Some personal issues I guess, but there’s not much excuse for a film like this…